Thursday, July 26, 2012
Sanctuary or War Zone?
Marriage 101 :
The home is supposed to be a sanctuary, a safe place to relax and refresh and yet for many a married couple it isn't. Many have the idea that home with my spouse is where I get to "let my hair down"... to "be myself" ... I can blow off steam here but instead of blowing off steam... I blow up. Everyone at home gets the brunt of the anger and frustration from the days events. At home maybe I can't actually blow up at the person(s) that made my day so aggravating but I don't need to be concerned with controlling my tongue or my actions because here... well, I can't really be fired for saying what I think. In the long run the family and the spouse end up with the short stick. They end up with the "fleshly" uncontrolled side of you while you give everyone else the self-controlled side. To me... that's backwards.
In your vows, you and your spouse said I'm giving up everyone else in the world for you and you alone. They've seen you at your worst and they've stayed in spite of it. So why is it alright to give your spouse the worst side of you and give everyone else..... people who couldn't care less about you, people who don't know you from Adam and don't care to... Why is it that we give them the better and sometimes the best side of us? Why is it we ...(excuse me for being so blunt)... we give our families and most of all our spouses our proverbial butt to kiss? This is NOT what Christ did for and continues to do for us.
What we do AT HOME matters.
Who we are AT HOME is important.
Our mission beyond all others is to BE CHRIST in our own homes with those that God has given us. Our priorities are out of line when we put all others above our own family. God does not approve of our actions when we give our best to everyone else and we give our families especially our spouse whatever is left over. It's time we re-evaluate and re-adjust our lives. Christian marriages are failing at the same rate as non-christian marriages because we think of everyone else outside of our marriage as those that need ministered to. We cannot conveniently forget that when we married our spouse became our #1 mission field.
A christian marriage is a ministry and we are the ministers.