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Thursday, July 26, 2012

Sanctuary or War Zone?


Marriage 101 :  

     The home is supposed to be a sanctuary, a safe place to relax and refresh and yet for many a married couple it isn't.  Many have the idea that home with my spouse is where I get to "let my hair down"... to "be myself" ...  I can blow off steam here but instead of blowing off steam... I blow up.  Everyone at home gets the brunt of the anger and frustration from the days events.  At home maybe I can't actually blow up at the person(s) that made my day so aggravating but I don't need to be concerned with controlling my tongue or my actions because here... well, I can't really be fired for saying what I think.  In the long run the family and the spouse end up with the short stick.  They end up with the "fleshly" uncontrolled side of you while you give everyone else the self-controlled side.  To me... that's backwards.  

     In your vows, you and your spouse said I'm giving up everyone else in the world for you and you alone.  They've seen you at your worst and they've stayed in spite of it.  So why is it alright to give your spouse the worst side of you and give everyone else..... people who couldn't care less about you,  people who don't know you from Adam and don't care to... Why is it that we give them the better and sometimes the best side of us? Why is it we ...(excuse me for being so blunt)... we give our families and most of all our spouses our proverbial butt to kiss?  This is NOT what Christ did for and continues to do for us.  

What we do AT HOME matters.

Who we are AT HOME is important.

     Our mission beyond all others is to BE CHRIST in our own homes with those that God has given us.  Our priorities are out of line when we put all others above our own family.  God does not approve of our actions when we give our best to everyone else and we give our families especially our spouse whatever is left over. It's time we re-evaluate and re-adjust our lives.  Christian marriages are failing at the same rate as non-christian marriages because we think of everyone else outside of our marriage as those that need ministered to.  We cannot conveniently forget that when we married our spouse became our #1 mission field.  

A christian marriage is a ministry and we are the ministers.

Saturday, July 14, 2012

Take NO for an Answer

     There is something so totally stubborn inside of each and everyone of us that loves to hear a hero or heroine shout out loud... I won't take NO for an answer!!  We raise our fists and shout YES!.. That's it, tell them right!...  Make them give it to you!  It's as if somehow the word NO is an evil that needs to be vanquished.  As children we remember the smack on the back of our hands or across our fanny and the NO that accompanied it as we reached for something we wanted but couldn't have.  This stays with us as we get older.  There are things that we want to do, places we want to go, stuff we want to have but we hear the word NO and we squirm at the sound of it and we fight.  As we grow up and get out on our own we may attempt to do those things we couldn't before.  Sometimes we go to those places we couldn't go to before.  We acclaim our victory over the word NO because now we have the freedom to make the decision ourselves and no one can tell us NO anymore.  That works for a little while till we painfully realize that we only traded our life under our parents for life under a society and government .... under a universe that still has rules.  We can still be told NO..... and we continue to fight it.   

     What is it about that word that makes us feel that person who says NO to us is only trying to control us, be mean to us, not let us have or do anything?

Thursday, July 12, 2012

I Took A Forced Time Out…


     Health issues always have a way of creeping up on me.  It’s like a major blind spot I seem to have.  I’m driving down life’s highway and getting ready to change lanes when next thing I know I get blindsided or rear ended.  Sometimes what comes into my life feels more like a head on collision.  That’s what I’ve been going through for the past several months.  From getting somewhat congested and coughing severely enough that I twist my back out of alignment…. to coming down with some bug that put me in the ER with my breathing after only five days… to fighting with breathing issues that don’t want to be tamed or blood sugars that don’t want to go down.  As you can see, things have been nuts surrounding me for months now but I'm not here to complain.

     I've tried periodically to post a little but it’s been hard to sit down and write when you can’t think of anything positive, challenging or encouraging to say to others.  I fought with "Why me?" ... "Not again!!!" ...  and "Why not, everything else is coming apart anyway."  I wanted to just crawl in a hole and pull a rock over me and tell the world to just leave me alone.  BUT...
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