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Monday, May 20, 2013

Reaching for a Dream (and changing my heart!)

     I have been absent from my blog for many weeks now but my mind and heart have always been here.  I've been in a constant state of asking God to help me prepare a new post directed solely at wives and women who think they may one day marry.  It will be a counter-part to the post Do You Have A Tarnished Crown? which was directly solely at husbands and received so well.  The post has been burning in my heart but I feel it is so vitally important so I refuse to rush it.

     In the meantime I've been reaching for a dream.  Growing up I always wanted to go to Bible College but I "supposedly" wasn't college material.  My parents also were not exactly going to send me.  So I hid that little dream back in the recesses of my heart and went on with life.  Well, 8 weeks ago I started.  I'm currently working towards an AA in Religion and carrying a 4.0 GPA. (sweet! and not easy!)  I don't know how far I want to go with this degree or maybe I should say, I don't know how far beyond an AA I will go at this time.  All I do know is that these last 8 weeks have been amazing.  I've had an opportunity to study the word of God in a way I've always wanted to and the word of God has come so much more alive in me.

     One of the little tidbits that has stuck in my heart for the last few weeks is a reflection back onto God's people (the Israelite's) and their constant failure to hold onto God.  When God brought them out of Egypt it is reflective of God's gift of salvation to us.  The giving of The Law is reflective of God's daily revealing to us of needed changes in our life.  The hardships they dealt with while in the wilderness are indicative of our struggles and the consequences of our disobedience to God.  The trip by the 12 spies into the promised land reveals our fight between faith and doubt.  

Can I really do what God has called me to do?  
Will God really take care of me?

There are always going to be more voices 
telling you the answer is:


You are not called to do that!  
God isn't with you!
You're not anointed!  
What would make you think you were?
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